0 How to involve your children and have a less stressful life

As a mother of 7 children, I found it a lot easier when I delegated jobs and my children helped me, rather than trying to do everything myself.  I did not find it easier from the point of view that the jobs were done properly, but at least they were occupied and not causing trouble whilst I was getting on with my chores.

The first thing I did was to work out which jobs could be done by which children.  For example, the younger children could not do ironing, or cooking, or preparing food, whilst the older children were not occupied with putting toys away in boxes with the pictures on them - matching the toy to the picture on the box.

Once I had selected the right jobs to the appropriate age group of my children, I set about visually preparing a chart, and giving the badge incentives to the younger children.  My older children were content with earning their pocket money.  With the younger children I used to give a treat after each 5 badges earned.

It is always good to follow through any incentives throughout the day to keep them intrested and involved. If your child is under 5 speak to your childcare provider, ask them to report any "helpful things" that your child has done throughout the day so that they can be rewarded. I found my nursery through a search at day nurseries in Southwark (this is my Area) but should you require any other information on nurseries in the Uk. Visit look4nurseries.co.uk.

Every parent knows their own children's capabilities, and with this in mind, it is important to choose appropriate tasks.  I was careful though not to stereotype, and the boys sorted washing, etc, as well as the girls.  I found that my children were more responsible and less likely to make a mess, if they knew they were going to tidy it up.  I was amused to hear my 21 year old not long ago telling my 14 year old girl, that he would pay if she tidied his room, and he had even given a list of jobs and amounts that he would pay to her.  Obviously this philosophy continues through generations, and I think this is important to remember.  How you treat your children , is most probably how they are going to treat their own.

Team work is an important feature of any employment, and a family is a team, I found that treating my family as a team, and allocating jobs, was important for us to identify with each other, and also the children felt everybody was given responsibilities, and not one person was picked upon.  The difference in how the children got along was tremendous once they realised they were all working for the same goal.  Most importantly I was a much better person, and did not feel that everybody took advantage of me, which was my opinion before I started this.

As a mother of 7 children I have always found that my babies have let me know when they were ready for solids. Unfortunately they do not listen to experts, and life can be pretty stressful, if you follow the book.

So all i can do is share my experiences and i hope i help a few people along the way. For more links used on this page visit - day nurseries in Southwark